School Daze

Okay, it came and went...with barely a ripple and nary a tear or tantrum! What came, you say??? THE FIRST TWO WEEKS OF SCHOOL!

I accompanied Wyatt and Rosalie (as she is known at school and in the community) to school on the first day, and though she put on a brave face, she did stop at the doorway to her Second Grade Classroom. Her eyes were big and her feet didn't want to move, but with a gentle pull and a wink from Mom, she followed Wyatt in. I stayed and helped in class the first two days, at her request, but was told that my supportive services were no longer needed by Wednesday ("Mommy, no come to school tomorrow"). The words were wonderful to hear. There is a great ESL Aide which comes in to help Rosalie and another young man in the mornings, and her teacher is simply WONDERFUL, so I know that my services truly are not needed. In the two weeks since she has attended school, there have been no withdrawals or shut-downs and she has been excited to go every day. I have been pleasantly surprised at just how well she is doing (although I am still expecting some shut-downs once the class moves to harder concepts and more reading--I still claim to be a realist not an "ol' sour puss" as my hubby and mother like to call me...but sour puss or not I LOVE being wrong in this case). She even has begun to raise her hand in class to ask or answer a question, and she nearly made me cry when she read two full sentences by herself during class reading time. She is not so excited to do more schoolwork when she gets home, but she enjoys working on reading.

The separation between the girls was not as traumatic as I thought it might be, and I credit that mostly to my wonderful Mother. She has come to help out for these two weeks and has simply been indispensable. She adores the girls and Rodas has her wrapped around her teeny pinky (and Nana admits it, too!). The first week of school, Noah was home with her as well and the two played wonderfully together--it was a good bonding time for the two of them. When Noah started school this week (which, by the way, I was only allowed to accompany Dad, who was the chosen one to take Noah to school...), Rodas had Nana's undivided attention and she reveled in it. I am so in trouble on Monday when Rodas expects the same devoted fan club and instead finds that she has to share Mom with the laundry, cleaning the house, and getting meals ready. But, for now, she barely notices when sister has left...and if she takes a peek at the picture of the two of them secreted away in her Tinkerbell backpack, it does not seem to cause sadness but instead just a reminder that she will be home soon.

I know Tsegereda misses Rodas, as one of the first things she did in class was draw a picture of her and Rodas, but she has made a few girl friends at school and I believe that has helped so much in her transition away from her sister.


I did receive a number of questions from the kids that know Wyatt and I about whether she is his sister and how can I be her Mom, so I did go in this week--with Wyatt and Rosalie's consent--to speak to the class about adoption, our family and Ethiopia. I read a great book about different families (Families are Different, by Todd Parr) and spoke about our adoption of the girls. I showed them a Tigrinya-English children's book and they were awed when they saw the Tigrinya alphabet. There were some wonderful questions, and I caught the kids when, at the end of the discussion, I asked "So, is Wyatt Rosalie's real brother?" The kids shook their heads "no." I expected this, but had hoped to hear some yes'. I nodded and said "Yes, he is. Sooo, am I Rosalie's real mother?" Once again, most shook their heads. I nodded and said "Yes, I am." I explained that even though I did not bring her or her sister into this world, I am the one that will kiss their hurts, I am the one that will sit with them all night when they are sick or scared, I am the one that will be sobbing at their wedding, I will be their Mom forever.

I think they understood it then.

Families are not forged out of blood, but out of love.